Message from Keith: January 29th, 2008

Today marks Taylor's one week anniversary at the hospital. It's a weird sort of half-life here. Time passes, but it is as if we are outside of it. Day, night, dusk, dawn, all meld together into a blurry existence. This one week feels like a lifetime. We have many lifetimes to come.

I feel like we turned a corner yesterday. Before yesterday, every piece of news we learned concerning Taylor's condition was bad. Certainly, yesterday's confirmation that her tumor is inter-cranial continued that streak. But, we finally learned pieces of good news. Despite being inter-cranial, the tumor has no brain involvement. Moreover, after extensive imaging studies of her head, neck, spine, chest, abdomen, and pelvis, there is no evidence of metastasis anywhere. That makes a huge difference in our outlook and, more importantly, in Taylor's prognosis. Even better, she finally began her treatment which brings us every day closer to a cancer-free and(hopefully more immediately) pain-free Taylor. It is her pain that has caused us the most worry over the last week.

We finally consulted both the oncologist and radiation oncologist yesterday. I will not rehash the oncologist consultation because Kris already has. The radiation oncologist explained the five-day-a-week regimen of radiation she will receive for 28 sessions. Unfortunately, because of the location of her tumor, they must irradiate otherwise healthy brain cells to stop the spread of the disease and ensure its eradication. She will face life-long side effects. Her adult upper teeth will likely never appear, save a few in the front. Her pituitary gland will likely cease working necessitating thyroid replacement therapy and possible doses of growth hormone as she ages. Her ability to mentally process information quickly may be stunted and she may have to take untimed tests, for instance. She may have trouble with memorization. The growth of her cheek bones may be stunted. Her overall treatment may last only 42 weeks, but many of the side effects will be issues for years to come.

It is hard to consign Taylor to the fate that her radiation and chemotherapy will cause. These are choices parents should never have to make. We have no option, though, if we want to preserve her life (and believe me we do!). The silent malevolence growing in her head has seen to that.

Today has been a hard day because Taylor has thrown up a number of times; side effects from yesterday's chemo treatment. In keeping with the turning the corner theme, however, she has stopped throwing up blood. Although there were considerable amounts the first couple of times she threw up, the last time was blood-free. Another bit of hope.

It is impossible to express how thankful we are to all of the people who have extended prayers, good wishes, and offers of help. We will never be able to adequately acknowledge your generosity and articulate our thanks in a manner commensurate with all of the love we have received. All I can say is thank you all from the bottom of our hearts.